Dear Suzie,

I saw your post titled My Daughter Won’t Talk to Me.

My daughter has always been my greatest treasure. She’s 18 and living with her boyfriend and going to college. Recently I heard through her dad that she didn’t want to tell me what was going on in her life.

We have had great times and bad times. I feel like the thread of our relationship is so fragile.

I can’t turn the clock back to yesterday. So often I wish I had done a better job of being her parent. As I look back, I know I could have done so much better, made better choices. There was never a time when I physically hurt her, but the emotional turmoil we sometimes had did enough damage.

Unfortunately, I can’t change the past. . .

Michele

Dear Michele,

One of the most powerful things we can do as parents is admit what we did in error. Not just to ourselves, but to our children.

You can share exactly what you said to me.

“I wish things had been easier. I regret the part I played in the emotional turmoil. I can’t change that but I can take responsibility for it. I’m willing to work toward the best relationship we can have today because you matter to me so much.”

Suzie