How can you heal from what you cannot define?
Let’s take a look at what spiritual abuse might look like. . .
- A person holds too much power over you, but you don’t know what to do about it.
- One who demands proof that you offer allegiance to them above family or your own convictions.
- You are continually led by teaching to the fear of God, with no balance of mercy or grace.
- Scriptures quoted are out of context, or a theology is constructed upon one verse or passage.
- No room for questions.
- You are a sinner if you leave their church to attend another.
- Defined by qualities such as arrogance — exterior righteousness without the fruits in their life, or even hypocrisy.
Now, before we pull out our pen and start checking these off, please understand that every church and every person within may have areas where their human nature shows through.
Churches are comprised of flawed people who love Jesus who want to grow together and love others.
But if you have lived in fear, or grew up thinking that you were “less than” though you tried to be “good” and it was never enough . .
If someone has asked you to do things that go against what the Holy Spirit is speaking as truth in you. . .
If your church doctrine points the fingers at other Christian churches and says they aren’t as good as them. . .
If a parent raised you with such a harsh, legalistic view of God that it affected not only the way you view yourself, but perhaps the way you viewed God. . .
. . . then let’s not be afraid to call it what it is. Not to point fingers or try to fix anyone, but because God can heal you and you can rediscover what it means to be a part of the Church.
Q: Which of these attributes of spiritual abuse surprised you?
Q: The quote above reads, “We worship among people, but we worship only God.” What does that mean to you?
Q: How do we confuse the way God views us with the way people present God?
Q: Share one passage or thought from Chapter Three – When the Church Hurts Your Heart that ministered to you.
Q: If you are healed from spiritual abuse, what is one thing you’d tell someone still in it?
Thank you for sharing the tweets below, if you would. It helps reach others who might be experiencing untended brokenness.
{Click to tweet→} We worship among people, but we worship only God. #themendedheart
{Click to tweet→} It’s hard to heal from what we cannot define. 7 traits of spiritual abuse. #themendedheart
So, what do you do about it? Tomorrow we’ll explore what it means to turn your heart toward truth rather than people.
Suzie
Good Morning Suzie, What powerful words you write in chapter three. “Hurting people hurt people. They are the walking wounded. Just because someone is a follower of Christ doesn’t mean they are not deeply wounded.” These words really hit a core in my heart. Having been in leadership in the church and been pushed away has left me very confused. I do not understand the pastor who did this but reading the above words helps me feel the power Christ has over me and not this pastor’s power over me.
My prayer is to find a new place to worship and “Be in God’s arms” for awhile to heal and listen to and read Jesus and God’s words to fill my heart back up with His love. I have lived in confusion for a little over a year now and it’s time to remember your words, ” We worship among imperfect people, but we worship only our perfect Savior.”
Thank you for taking your precious time to write this book which has touched my heart.