I used to be afraid to talk to people.

If I were in WalMart and I saw you across the store, I’d go down a different aisle. It wasn’t that I didn’t like you, or that I didn’t want to be your friend, but I wasn’t sure what to say.

If you spotted me first, I’d chat and put on a good face and pretend that I wasn’t afraid, but afterward I’d wonder. . .

Did I say the wrong thing?

Or a dumb thing?

It’s so weird to consider the girl I once was, because today I’d put my hands on the cart and march across the store to say hello.

And I wouldn’t give a thought about what I said, or didn’t say. I’d simply enjoy the conversation.


When you discover your true identity, you don’t have to pretend (or be afraid) anymore. 

Our broken mirror of the past can cause us to see a distorted image staring back at us.

That distorted image isn’t just a detriment to you personally, it can trip you up as a mom.

When your child gets angry or acts up or it’s a hard mom day, you might cave in to fear.

I must be really bad at this.

I will never get this right.

When I finally looked in the mirror and saw a beautiful, work-in-progress, loved-like-crazy woman of faith, everything changed.

If I had a hard mom day/wife day/Suzie day/afraid of my shadow day, I just accepted that most of the universe faces fear at some point, and we get to work through it.

The Message version of Proverbs 27:19 says, “Just as water mirrors your face, so your face mirrors your heart.”

When I began to see myself through the eyes of God, rather than the eyes of my past it took the pressure off to be perfect. . . because no one is perfect.

It took the pressure off to try to pretend to have all the answers. . . because no one has all the answers.

I could just be me.

The mom who might not be the best PTA volunteer (and if you are, thank God for you!), but loved to jump on the bed with her kids.

The mom who wasn’t afraid to be goofy and silly with her children.

The mom who apologized when she messed up.

The mom who was learning, and would always be learning, to be the most honest and best version of herself that she could be.


 Re-read Chapter Two of The Mom I Want to Be: Rising Above the Past to Give Your Kids a Great Future. 

Q: Imagine that mirror. If you’ve been seeing a distorted image based on the past or words or actions of others, then ask God to show you your heart. Journal what you sense God speaking to you.

Q: Rather than “perfect,” use one word to describe you as a mom.

Q: Do you ever compare yourself to other moms? What might happen if you began to value your unique attributes in this role?

Lord, thank you for the woman reading this today. You see her. She is uniquely and wonderfully made by you. There are qualities in her that delight you. Thank you for creating us so individually. Thank you for her child. Today she delights in her child, and in his or her differences and unique qualities. In Your powerful, beautiful name, amen.