fixed

 

I picked up 10 pounds over Christmas. I’ve been in denial. After all, I’ve been the same weight for years. I eat healthy —  except for that Key Lime pie I had the other day, and that donut they were handing out before church and. . .

I work out. Well, I walk a lot.

Okay, sometimes I don’t walk. Like when it rains.

But I subscribe to Daily Burn. . . but I haven’t used it much.

Oh crud. 

I’m out of excuses.

And this extra 10 pounds isn’t a vanity issue. It’s a “get-in-my-way-issue.” The reality is that I really do want to live a long, healthy life. I want to run with my grandkids. I want my clothes to fit. I want to run up stairs and ride bikes on sunny summer days.

And that muffin-top move I make with my jeans, I’m kind of over it.

The extra 10 pounds has to go and the first thing I will shed in that process is my excuses.

I know that this is a hard topic. It makes you think of finger wagging and “shoulds” and “you ought to’s.” But it’s not. Not at all. It’s just being honest with myself — in a good way. It’s admitting that I have things I want to do, and something is in the way.

Years ago I wanted nothing more than to be whole. To feel like myself, the real self I knew existed somewhere in there. I sensed God gently beckoning me to deeper waters, higher paths, more adventure, greater intimacy with Him, new horizons.

What a beautiful gift, so what did I offer Him in response?

Excuses.

I’ll take you on that offer when she says she’s sorry.

I’ll go deeper when I feel more secure.

I’ll forgive when the memories aren’t so real.

I’ll trust in You when I’m more assured of me.

My excuses became self-made mountains I refused to climb.

Which meant that, despite the fact that I wanted to be whole, that I wanted nothing more than to live and love and laugh fully, those excuses stood in the way.

What does it look like to stop offering excuses to God?

It’s surrender.

I know that I talk about this word a lot, but when I don’t know how to do it on my own and there’s a lot of stuff tangled in there that makes it seem impossible, it’s all I have to offer Him.

It’s so much greater a response than an.excuse.

Surrender looks like this:

I’ll heal whether anyone else wants to be fixed or not.

I’ll go deeper because He is waiting in those deeper waters for me.

I’ll forgive old memories so I can make new ones, not just for me but for my children.

I’ll trust that He sees something in me and that’s enough.

Giving up excuses completely changes the trajectory of your thinking.

It completely changes you.

And this is something I had no way of knowing way back then. It changes relationships and people.

Those you love see you tackling that mountain with His help and they are changed, too.

What is your excuse?

No finger wagging, “you oughta” tone here. We’re just a bunch of brave girls holding out our hands for all that God desires to give.

And I’m just a friend who’s putting on her walking shoes and preparing for a nice, long walk — on the pavement and in my heart.

Just a friend wishing you were here to walk with me.

Suzie