fix you

You want to fix your husband.

You want to fix your teenager.

You want to fix your church or your pastor.

You want to fix that mother-in-law whose words hurt your heart.

If you, like me, could be a member of Fixers Anonymous, wave your hand. For years I thought this was a strength, when it was actually bondage.

I was trapped in thinking that I somehow had the ability to fix a situation when two people were at odds with each other, especially in my family.

I was mired in the emotions that rose inside of me when it didn’t work like I hoped it would.

I wanted members of my family to play fair, be nice, live a life that produced good fruit, make good choices, treat me with respect, treat each other with respect, treat themselves with respect, love God, be kind with their words . . .

That’s a really long list, isn’t it?

It was exhausting to be the overseer of that list. It set us all up for failure.

It also didn’t allow that person to find their own way, to experience consequences (negative or positive), or to listen to God for themselves because my fixer upper voice was so loud, even if I didn’t say a word.

But that wasn’t the worst of my fixer upper tendencies. When you are actively trying to fix everyone else, it doesn’t leave much room for God to do His work in you.

If I’m trying to fix you, how can God work on me?

That’s the question I began to ask. It was life changing.

We aren’t in the fixing business. We don’t get to chisel and hammer away until a person fits our mold.

Here are three things we can do.

What are your thoughts about fixing others? What have you learned?

How does our faith help us in those hard places where we really want to fix something or someone?

It’s #livefreeThursday. We’ll be talking about those things we feel we need to fix all day long. Let’s pray for each other, encourage each other, and grow together.


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