Some friends and I were talking about living “shaken” by the power of God. I asked them what that meant to them.
“It means that I would live in such a way that it would quieten my quivery soul,” one friend said.
That phrase kept coming back to me for days. Quivery like jello? Quivery as in cold and shaky? When I told a few others, they instantly identified.
No, Suzie. Qui-ve-ry. Afraid. Unsure. Trembling.
We’ve all faced days when we have anxious thoughts, but it’s hard when they consume us. Today, a beautiful #livefree friend, Alisa Nicaud, shares how living as the 13th disciple changed her quivery soul to a brave heart. ~ Suzie
I am the 13th Disciple
I have to admit that when Suzie first introduced the idea of being the 13th disciple, I was a little intimidated.
Sitting among the great 12 who walked with Jesus and boldly presented the gospel left me feeling a bit unqualified to say the least.
Yet as I began the journey, I realized that the term disciple is not a status, but a calling—an invitation really.
Have you ever found yourself in the ocean and wanting to go just a little further out? Growing up at the beach, I saw small white caps in the distance that lured me into deeper waters. I would heed its beckoning call, but there always came a point where I felt a sudden drop off. The place where my feet would no longer reach the bottom.
It was usually at that point that I scurried back to the shore, and safely planted my feet into the sand.
There was something about the unknown that prevented me from advancing to where I really wanted to go.
As the 13th disciple, I comfortably slipped right into the shoes of Peter.
One minute he followed Jesus and the next minute he was back to fishing.
Another time he was stepping out of the boat, and then cries out that he’s drowning.
I understood his zeal to do great things, followed by a disappointment from lack of accomplishment. He wanted to follow Jesus, he believed. There was a hunger in him to go deeper, but there were times when the task ahead left him feeling restless and wanting to give up.
Jesus saw Peter’s weaknesses, but knew the man he would become. So rather than dumping him as a disciple, he taught him how to believe.
Jesus sees my weaknesses, but knows the woman I am becoming.
Yes, Jesus does know my weaknesses & yet hasn’t given up on me & won’t. ❤ I pray that I will have the boldness of Esther & the commitment of Mary Magdalene to follow my precious Jesus daily.
Alisa, I was so blessed by your video and yes I do want to come with Jesus as his 13 th disciple also! Your video really made me think and the part you shared about how you would speak scriptures over and over and over and then you began to see a real helping and difference in your walk with Jesus and with your health , ( anxiety ) mind , body , and soul! Thank you for that very fact that I knew about God’s word the. Holy Spirit but needed it to be waken up in my mind and quickened in my heart and soul to begin to do that regularly and I will see prayers and healing happen in my own life ! Thank you and God Bless you sweetie! It meant so much to mean I felt God speak directly to my heart !
How interesting, Suzie, that everyone you asked about “quivery” immediately mentioned fear. That’s the message I get too!
Alisa, your video is BEAUTIFUL! I loved your testimony of grabbing on to Jesus’ garment, proclaiming scripture over yourself, even 50+ times a day. I’ve been there too, and God changed me. I want to be that 13th disciple too. 🙂
I often think of quivery as excited, and was surprised to discover they come from the same place emotionally. I love that Alisa moved from fear to excitement at what God has in store for her!
Love linking up and reading such inspirational messages! Great job Alisa! Thank you for being real and sharing your journey. Blessings to all @livefreeThursday community!
Oh Alisa, this is POWERFUL! Thank you for sharing from your most vulnerable places! My entire family has dealt with fear and anxiety since surviving a tornado. I am so OVER IT! Just as I think we’re all moving forward, we seem to take three steps back. What in the world?! We’re in ministry, we know how to conquer fear! And yet, here we find ourselves, at a crossroads, scared to go too far one direction or the other. It’s a daily battle, really. Thank you for your encouragement today!
I so identify with Peter, as well. I so identify with the woman w/ the issue of blood. I felt like you were reading my journals as I watched your video and read your words today!
Thank you for sharing! I loved this, “Jesus saw Peter’s weaknesses, but knew the man he would become. So rather than dumping him as a disciple, he taught him how to believe.” YES! I’m so glad that Jesus sees my weaknesses and yet is able to still use me.
Suzie, thank you for hosting Alisa today! Powerful stuff!!
Tragedy and disasters have a way of really making us question what we believe, don’t they? We can know the Word in our hearts, but it seems to get tested in our minds. I know the daily battle and the struggle that comes along with overcoming fear. But I also know that God is bigger! I’m believing He will show up in mighty ways on behalf of your family. The fact that you guys survived is proof of His grace! Praying for breakthrough and hearts that become as bold as lions. 💗
My dear, Alisa, you are such a petite and tiny young lady but GOD shines like a big light to others. Next to my nephew, ( your husband), you appear to be little in stature, but the truth is GOD has grown you up to higher heights. Our family loves you and you are an example to us of strength and commitment to our Savior. Keep on shinning and being a third Apostle.
Alisa, thank you for this lovely link up. As I continue to grow in God, my faith, my writing, your blog resonates that these are all opportunities. I love when you said “as I began the journey, I realized that the term disciple is not a status, but a calling—an invitation really.” I needed that reminder that God has sent me an invitation and is waiting for my response with a definite ‘yes’ versus a lukewarm ‘maybe.’
Lemon, I love that response: A definite yes vs a lukewarm maybe. I have so been there many times. Especially when it’s something I’m not comfortable with. Have a beautiful weekend!
Alisa, I loved the video. So encouraging. I love your personal story along with the challenge to not just sit in our worry but live in what God has called us to do and offered us in return for following Him. So great, friend! Thanks for sharing. Have a wonderful week!
Alisa, it was so awesome to read your words here on Suzie’s blog. Thanks for encouraging us to go into the deep with our Jesus. Loved hearing your voice! This encouraged my heart so much.
Saying Yes to God When You Want to Say No - Faith Spilling Over - […] Testimony Tuesday, Kelly Balarie’s #RaRaLinkup, Jennifer Dukes Lee’s #TellHisStory, Suzie Eller’s #livefreeThursday, Lyli Dunbar’s Thought-Provoking Thursday, and Arabah Joy’s Grace…
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Yes, Jesus does know my weaknesses & yet hasn’t given up on me & won’t. ❤
I pray that I will have the boldness of Esther & the commitment of Mary Magdalene
to follow my precious Jesus daily.
I agree, Denise!
Alisa, I was so blessed by your video and yes I do want to come with Jesus as his 13 th disciple also! Your video really made me think and the part you shared about how you would speak scriptures over and over and over and then you began to see a real helping and difference in your walk with Jesus and with your health , ( anxiety ) mind , body , and soul! Thank you for that very fact that I knew about God’s word the. Holy Spirit but needed it to be waken up in my mind and quickened in my heart and soul to begin to do that regularly and I will see prayers and healing happen in my own life ! Thank you and God Bless you sweetie! It meant so much to mean I felt God speak directly to my heart !
How interesting, Suzie, that everyone you asked about “quivery” immediately mentioned fear. That’s the message I get too!
Alisa, your video is BEAUTIFUL! I loved your testimony of grabbing on to Jesus’ garment, proclaiming scripture over yourself, even 50+ times a day. I’ve been there too, and God changed me. I want to be that 13th disciple too. 🙂
I often think of quivery as excited, and was surprised to discover they come from the same place emotionally. I love that Alisa moved from fear to excitement at what God has in store for her!
Such a good perspective!
I love it, Betsy! Sometimes….many times, going deeper means pressing in- even if it’s every 5 minutes! Thank you for cheering me on!!
“…the term disciple is not a status, but a calling—an invitation really.”
Alisa – thank you for helping me see being a disciple in this way! What a powerful teaching you have offered here! Thank You!!!
Suzie – thank you for hosting Alisa.
Thanks Leigh Ellen! It took realizing that for me to be able to get through doing the video! Thank you Lord, it’s not about me!
Love linking up and reading such inspirational messages! Great job Alisa! Thank you for being real and sharing your journey. Blessings to all @livefreeThursday community!
Thanks Kelsey! I appreciate your encouragement!
Oh Alisa, this is POWERFUL! Thank you for sharing from your most vulnerable places! My entire family has dealt with fear and anxiety since surviving a tornado. I am so OVER IT! Just as I think we’re all moving forward, we seem to take three steps back. What in the world?! We’re in ministry, we know how to conquer fear! And yet, here we find ourselves, at a crossroads, scared to go too far one direction or the other. It’s a daily battle, really. Thank you for your encouragement today!
I so identify with Peter, as well. I so identify with the woman w/ the issue of blood. I felt like you were reading my journals as I watched your video and read your words today!
Thank you for sharing! I loved this, “Jesus saw Peter’s weaknesses, but knew the man he would become. So rather than dumping him as a disciple, he taught him how to believe.” YES! I’m so glad that Jesus sees my weaknesses and yet is able to still use me.
Suzie, thank you for hosting Alisa today! Powerful stuff!!
Tragedy and disasters have a way of really making us question what we believe, don’t they? We can know the Word in our hearts, but it seems to get tested in our minds. I know the daily battle and the struggle that comes along with overcoming fear. But I also know that God is bigger! I’m believing He will show up in mighty ways on behalf of your family. The fact that you guys survived is proof of His grace! Praying for breakthrough and hearts that become as bold as lions. 💗
My dear, Alisa, you are such a petite and tiny young lady but GOD shines like a big light to others.
Next to my nephew, ( your husband), you appear to be little in stature, but the truth is GOD has grown
you up to higher heights.
Our family loves you and you are an example to us of strength and commitment to our Savior.
Keep on shinning and being a third Apostle.
Thanks, Aunt Barbara!!
Alisa, thank you for this lovely link up. As I continue to grow in God, my faith, my writing, your blog resonates that these are all opportunities. I love when you said “as I began the journey, I realized that the term disciple is not a status, but a calling—an invitation really.” I needed that reminder that God has sent me an invitation and is waiting for my response with a definite ‘yes’ versus a lukewarm ‘maybe.’
Lemon, I love that response: A definite yes vs a lukewarm maybe. I have so been there many times. Especially when it’s something I’m not comfortable with. Have a beautiful weekend!
Alisa, I loved the video. So encouraging. I love your personal story along with the challenge to not just sit in our worry but live in what God has called us to do and offered us in return for following Him. So great, friend! Thanks for sharing. Have a wonderful week!
Thanks Jaime! I appreciate your encouragement! 💗
Alisa, it was so awesome to read your words here on Suzie’s blog. Thanks for encouraging us to go into the deep with our Jesus. Loved hearing your voice! This encouraged my heart so much.
You are so sweet, Lyli! Thank you for sharing a part of this journey with me and for always being a cheerleader!