Am I a bad Christian?
I received this question privately. I don’t think she’s the only one struggling with this, so I asked for permission to share her question.
Dear Suzie, self-doubt has plagued me my entire life. That only makes me more frustrated because I have heard that once you are fully focused on Christ, you won’t ever have confidence issues. When I saw your 21-Day Adventure, I thought: “This is my one thing I can’t seem to get past.” This leads me to doubt myself more. What a mess! Am I a bad Christian? Am I not reading my Bible enough? Do I need to pray more?
~ A
I’m glad that she asked her question, but it makes my heart heavy. If doubting makes you a “bad Christian,” then that disqualifies many great women and men of faith.
When the Lord spoke to Moses (Exodus 3:1-12) and spelled out his plan for him, Moses said (paraphrased), “Lord, I’m not the right person. I stutter (Exodus 4:10-11).” God expressed confidence, while Moses pointed out his inadequacy.
For a long time I thought Moses’ stuttering was literal — until I read this verse:
Moses was educated in all the wisdom of the Egyptians and was powerful in speech and action. Exodus 7:22
When I studied that further, I discovered that Moses was educated by the best of the best. He lived as an adoptive grandson of the Pharaoh. While Moses pointed out his flaws, people and God saw him as a born leader.
Paul was passionate, but a critical word from listeners had the power to plant doubt (2 Corinthians 10:10). Can you imagine sharing your heart with a crowd, only to hear that you were “unimpressive and your speaking amounts to nothing?”
Ouch!
Yet Paul planted churches, witnessed miracles, and is still considered the greatest evangelist of all time. God had a plan to expand the church to reach the Gentiles, and Paul was a part of that plan. Maybe he wasn’t the best speaker in all the land, but he was anointed and that was greater than a perfect 3-point sermon.
[bctt tweet=”If you follow Jesus, it won’t be a doubt-free walk. It will be a dependent walk. #livingfreetogether ” username=”suzanneeller”]
We all struggle with doubt.
The problem is when we allow doubt to overshadow God’s trust in us.
[bctt tweet=”Our doubt in ourselves isn’t greater than God’s trust in us. #livingfreetogether ” username=”suzanneeller”]
My answer to “A” was simple.
You are not a bad Christian. You are a Christ follower. The more we focus on Christ, the more we see how human we all are. That leads us to place our confidence in him, rather than our own abilities.
Read your bible because it draws you closer to him. It teaches you. Pray because it’s communication with God, and there’s power in prayer.
Sister, God can use your life. If you have confidence issues, like we all do, imagine the glory God will receive as he uses your life in spite of them.
Today, let’s take our focus off of our doubts. Let’s stop calling ourselves a “bad Christian” because we have doubts.
If you are following Jesus, it won’t be a doubt-free walk. It will be a dependent walk.
God can use that, yes he can.
Suzie
Day #9 of Moving Past What You Cannot Change
I’m a speaker. I was fascinated that both Paul and Moses had doubts in their ability to communicate. I understand! Yet it is where God has called me. It’s where I depend on him the most.
- Name one area in which you have doubted that God can use you.
If you look at the life of Paul or Moses, you see both the weakness and how God used them in spite of their doubts.
- How might God see your weakness or doubt different than you?
Moses said he was a stutterer. Stephen said he was powerful in both speech and action.
- Which of these are true?
- Is it possible that they could both be true, and why?
[inlinkz_linkup id=716303 mode=1]
Dear Suzanne, as usual I enjoy your Bible study here. We tend to be critical of our walk because many of us focus on “works”.
Works would make us doubt. We will keep asking if we have done enough,too little or not good enough! While God just wants us to walk in faith and with all our hearts.
Works are good but doesn’t mean it is ticket to salvation. It is done already through Jesus. And that’s where the power of grace and faith cones in.
Every thing we do should be done as an act of faith and purely dependent on the Holy Spirit as our strength and comfort as He pours grace daily upon us.
Thank you for encouraging a “dependent walk”
God bless Suzanne.
YES! Such a powerful thought to this post, Ifeoma!
Thank you for those powerful and encouraging words–‘Every thing we do should be done as an act of faith and purely dependent on the Holy Spirit as our strength and comfort.’ I am soaking up those heartfelt words. Blessings to you.
I agree Ifeoma we get wrapped up in works. I am reading the book The Shack. When Jesus was human, when he performed miracles Hedi so as a dependent, limited human being trusting in God (Papa) his life and power to be at work within him and through him. Jesus as a human being had no power within himself to heal anyone, only with God’s power. THAT is how we are to live.I still think it is awesome I was first led to do the Proverbs 31 Online Bible study Me Myself and lies, then this 21 day adventure came up, then the sermon series on The Shack. The first sermon was The great sadness. YES I am in the middle of the great sadness in my life. I know God and my husband John want me to move forward in my life. Thank you Suze for being an obedit daughter of God and leading this 21 day adventure. Praying for you and your family.
Thank you for sharing your words, Ifeoma. It is so easy to get wrapped up in what we need to be “doing” for our salvation instead of being the Christ-loving, faithful, family of Christ.
Oh, how my heart is full of doubt. “Am I cut out for ministry?” “Am I a good enough Christian?” “Am I displaying faith well enough?” “If I lose hope, does that mean I’ve stepped out of His anointing?”
These doubts can be draining and altering in my walk. I’m grateful for a community of fellow doubting Christians who shut that voice down. I’m thankful for my sweet Jesus who kisses me every night and says, “You are enough.” I’m grateful for His mercies every morning which allow for a fresh beginning. I’m grateful for posts like this from incredible women of faith like you, which reassure me that I’m not alone!
Crystal, you are love, you are beloved, you are an example of faith, you are strong and courageous. You are because of Him. Hugs and love to you.
Hi Crystal. You are indeed cut out for ministry and you are faithful to follow God–He is the guiding light. It’s so easy to doubt–I say this from experience, because I do it too. He loves us and it’s His path we are to follow. Love you sweet sister.
You are not alone, Chrystal. God uses your heart and your words and your life everyday to touch others with God’s love. You are loved and wonderfully made to serve all who cross your path, physically or in cyberspace.
Growing up poor, often dirty, sometimes hungry, living in HUD housing, on food stamps, with no hot water in our house, I grew into adult hood with serious doubts about my value. I also never truly believed in my abilities.
One ability doubt I had was being able to provide for me and my children. I stayed in an abusive marriage rather than face financial and material hardship. After my marriage, I spent 3 years living in denial, getting into credit card debt, eventually not being able to pay my bills each month. This is where I am right now.
I am just beginning a career that can, if I let it, fix my financial situation. I say if I let it, because I need to be very careful to let God’s will be done here. I need to let the vision God has of me be the one who goes to work each day.
I can see how my self doubts might make me better at my job, as I have suffered because of them and no longer want to. I think the hardships I’ve endured because of my self doubts are going to keep me motivated to work hard, and grateful when things change for the better. I also believe at the “end” of this (when my debt is gone, I have money in the bank for emergencies, and have purchased a home again) I will be a girl who knows better how to trust God- because of practice. I’m trusting right now, with faith this is what God wants, even though I still have my doubts sometimes!
Praying for you Shelley and your continuing journey with Jesus as your guide
Shelly, beautifully written words of life-truths and His truths. Praying for you, sister.
Praying for you Shelly to trust God so you can break free of not feeling worthy or valued. I am lifting you up so you can move toward what He has for you and your family. He has chosen the path for you–stay the course, praying and listening along the way.
You are growing!
Praying for you Shelly that you continue your journey with our Lord and continue to grow in your faith and trust. Also, praying that your new career works out for you and the steps you need to take, with confidence, to be more secure financially,
If I had to name one area it would be this – everything. I fight insecurities and doubt myself on a daily basis. But it’s in all areas. If I finally start thinking I have found something I like to do and can do well, it never fails that someone comes along that I immediately compare myself to and start doubting and say nope I wasn’t doing it right after all. This has led me many times to giving up. It has caused me to question whether or not God really told me to do this. It has led me to question if God can use me for anything. It has only been recently that I’ve been seeking God to overcome this. It’s still a daily struggle but through God, with God, because of God, I will overcome. It doesn’t make me a bad Christian. It does show how active the devil is and how he wants to keep Christians down and keep them from spreading God’s love. So don’t stop fighting even if you feel like it’s a losing battle. Keep seeking God in all you do. He is our refuge and our strength. God bless.
Hi Jen Renee, comparisons attack and detract our purpose, plan, and path from God. That liar sure can try to destroy our calling olaced on us by our Father. But God. He is your Healer, your biggest chearleader, and He seeks you daily. He has won the battle, settle in that truth. Thank you for sharing your realness and boldness of your life.
Oh, how I can relate! We started homeschooling when we moved states over 1 1/2 yrs ago. I have felt totally inadequate for this job! Especially when it comes to my teen daughter. I , many days, feel inadequate as a mom and wife. I play that dumb comparison game way too often. Ugh! I see what all the other moms got for Mother’s Day, how fun they are, what lessons their children are learning, meals they are making, etc…. I feel like a failure many days. But I know that is not how God sees me at all! I must do some more devil stomping around here! You too? Praying with you in the journey!
Every day of this study has been so relevant to my life right now! Thank you for the education and information, now to work on the application in my life!
Elle, it feels awkward at first. It’s not easy breaking patterns that we’ve come to feel as normal, but over time we create a new groove in our thinking and thus our behavior. I’m so grateful for our faith in all of this. The Holy Spirit is a teacher. He shows us the heart of the Father for us, and for that person that he loves as well. Thank you for coming around the table today. I’m grateful.
So much better to exchange the word bad to dependent! Encouraging to all, thanks, Suzi.
Oh, Suzie I too struggle with doubt. I totally feel called to write and speak, but it was never anything I planned on doing. In fact, it was probably at the bottom of my list. I have felt so incompetent as I look around to others that do it so much better. I have to remind myself when I write each post and with each speaking engagement. God called me, and he will equip me. I may not be a superstar, but I am obedient.
When I don’t remind myself of this, I am overwhelmed and can barely get the words out. Of course, I have to do my part and learn all I can but most important I have to rely on God.
Maree, what seems to be our weakness can be a strength, for it means that we trust God and his leading as we prepare, pray, take that step of faith. We are dependent on him, and find joy in the truth that he will meet us there. We learn, we grow, we keep taking those steps of faith. <3