Suzanne Eller, Living Free Together

Living free in faith, family, and feelings

You are free. . . from man-made rules

by 2 Comments

If you came over from Encouragement for Today, welcome. I’m so glad you are here.

Sometimes we just don’t know what is true. We see it on social media and we wonder. . .

We hear it in a sermon and we wonder. . .

A trusted person speaks it with authority and we wonder. . .

Jesus warned against falling into faith built of man-made rules.

So, how do we know what is true?

We follow Jesus. We listen for Jesus. We say yes to Jesus.

Too simplistic? No, absolutely freeing.

A few years ago I spent months in the book of Luke. I watched how he interacted with the broken. I watched how he talked with the religious. I listened as he interacted with those who were curious about him.

Man-made rules started falling off, one by one.

When Jesus called people to follow him, there was no requirement. No level of holiness demanded beforehand. No Bible degrees to be a part of the miracles.

Wait, what?

While there is beauty in a holy life and goodness to be found in studying his word, Jesus’ example showed me that it was his holiness that changed people. It was relationship with him that brought about transformation.

I threw my mental list of man-made rules away in that department.

One by one I wrote down the man-made rules I had mentally stacked in my faith. One by one, they lost their power.

When we get tangled in rules, we let go of Jesus. 

Which never works. 

Are you ready to transition from following a man-made rule to following Jesus?

Write down one man-made rule or impossible expectation you’ve placed on your faith. Invite God to take these from you in exchange for freedom.  

Suzie

Related Resources

Come With Me: Discovering the Beauty of Following Where He Leads

Hey, I’m doing a giveaway of my book, Come With Me, over at Instagram! Come join me.

What if waiting is part of the plan?

by 12 Comments

I admit it. I stink at waiting.

What does waiting feel like to you? It can bring out sadness or frustration. Maybe it makes you feel like God has forgotten that dream he poured over your heart.

I hear from God and I’m ready to do it yesterday. When it doesn’t happen, no matter how I’m feeling, I need to take a step back and remember this one thing:

Waiting isn’t wasted.

In fact, the finish line may not be the actual goal at all.

In today’s More Than Small Talk podcast, Holley, Jennifer, and I honestly share about those times when waiting felt like the hardest place to be.

Jennifer, Suzie, Holley — More Than Small Talk

Jennifer waited through a season of infertility. I waited when I felt like God had given me a message to share, but six years later all the doors were closed. Holley shared how her answer to a waiting prayer didn’t look anything like she thought it would.

If you are in a waiting season, I know it’s hard. I’ve been there too. You are not alone in that waiting place. There is comfort and clarity as we honestly talk about it with our Savior. These are the questions I ask in waiting seasons. Maybe they’ll be a great prayer starter for you too.

  1. Lord, is there a miracle you trying to perform right where I am?
  2. Will you help me to trust you with your timeline?
  3. Show me today’s assignment.

I don’t always hear the answers right away, but often find one thing he’s showing me that day. I find one thing that seems small, but it brings him joy. It takes my eyes off my timeline, my plan, and I start to see power of his work in the waiting season.

Are you in a waiting season? I’d love to pray with you. My prayer team would love to wrap around you.

Suzie

Related Resources

Listen to More Than Small Talk podcast.

While you’re there, we’d love for you to leave a review or share it with a friend. Today’s episode was Episode #19.

The resources mentioned in today’s podcast were:

In the trenches with the vulnerable

by 1 Comment

Right down the street is a vulnerable woman.

Right across from you in church is a vulnerable woman.

It’s easy to become overwhelmed when we think of all the needs around us. Maybe you think, What can one person do?

We can see them and we can support those who love them.

While we are not able to fix every issue, each of us can make a difference.

Today I share one of the most important conversations I’ve had in a long time. It’s with Lauren Snodgrass, a woman in the trenches with refugee families — deemed as the most vulnerable of the vulnerable.

In this conversation (listen on YouTube if you can’t get it here), Lauren shares the definition of a refugee. She shares a story of a family whose life was changed because people loved them.

[Read more…]

Should those words be said, or not?

by 3 Comments

Sometimes I don’t want to give a gentle answer. I want to say what is on my mind. I want to shout that I’m frustrated, or explain how I feel until they get it. I know there’s a healthy way to do this but it’s not always my first reaction.

That happened just the other day. I went to an event and then got in my car and called my sweet guy.

He had no idea what was coming.

I told him how frustrated I was. I explained in detail why this person had got under my skin. He allowed me to share those thoughts and to be genuinely angry. He knew I wasn’t mad at him, but felt protective over someone else. Words had landed in a the heart of a friend that felt hurtful and unjust.

Even as I shared those words with Richard, I knew that if I had spilled words in the moment, they wouldn’t have helped.

Angry words in the heat of the moment rarely takes anyone down a good path.

I realize that many who are reading this today might not have a husband or loved one who allows them to vent. It’s not something I do often. In fact it’s rare, but we all need a safe place to say, “That’s incredibly frustrating, or “I’m so mad I don’t even know what to do.”

The good news is we all have that living right inside of us. I don’t say that lightly. I don’t say that as a spiritual bandaid. Even though I shared what I needed to share with my sweet guy, God is the one who saw this situation from top to bottom. He’s the one who promises to show us what to do, what to say, what not to say. He’s the one I ultimately needed to share this with. . .

In today’s More Than Small Talk podcast, Holley, Jennifer, and I answered this confession question:

Do you have trouble controlling your mouth?

It was a question sent in by a listener and we all groaned when we received it — for the answer to that question is yes, this gets to all of us at some time or another.

In today’s podcast, we take this topic deep. I shared that I have learned one thing.

My first reaction doesn’t have to be my first response.

I can slow it down. I can pause and ask God to meet me in the middle of that emotion. I can ask him to help me to see the bigger picture. I can talk about it with a safe person who will listen, but also lead me closer to God in the process.

And I can always, always, let God see my wounded or angry heart and he will never turn me away.

I am not responsible for anyone else’s words or how they react, but I am responsible for my own.

If we were to all answer today’s confession question: Do you have trouble controlling your mouth? — there’s a good chance our answers would be all over the place. Some days. In some situations. I’m working on it. God’s doing miracles in this area.

Regardless of your answer, just know this, sweet friend. You aren’t alone in the struggle. When we stop to ask if those words should be shared or not, the Holy Spirit will show us what to do.

Suzie

Resources

Listen to More Than Small Talk podcast on your favorite podcast app or livestream it at KLRC.com.

Resources mentioned in today’s episode are:

Love a refugee in His name

Hey friends, did you know we are in the midst of a COMPASSION project? We are raising funds for refugee families relocated to the U.S. for much-needed dental care. One of the greatest needs after living for years in refugee camps is dental care and a source of pain for many. To find out more, check out Living Free Together’s Bright Smiles, Bright Future COMPASSION project.

Thank you for checking that out on this beautiful Day of Giving. <3

Strong women, soft hearts

by 6 Comments

If you had to pick only one attribute to describe yourself — a strong woman or a woman with a soft heart — which would you choose?

This felt like an impossible question when we asked it on More Than Small Talk today.

It led to a bigger question.

Why in the world should we have to choose?

Sometimes culture tries to tell us what strength should look like. We are told that being soft-hearted is weak. We are told that being a strong woman makes us “too much.” We can be both soft-hearted and strong. And the world needs both.

KLRC Podcast Network

In today’s More Than Small Talk podcast, we wrestled with this conversation.

These were some of our thoughts:

  • Never let the world define you (amen!)
  • Shut out negative voices to listen for God’s leading
  • You don’t have to choose to be strong or soft-hearted

I may have even quoted a line from one of my all-time favorite shows to prove my point, but this is a better word from Paul.

Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 (NLT)

There are times you won’t feel strong. There are times when your soft heart fails to lead. Don’t feel condemned when that happens. Instead, that’s exactly when we lean into our relationship with Christ to find what we need — and that is strong!

Never ever apologize for being a strong woman with a soft heart. Be who you are. Let God use those traits to impact a world.

And let’s be strong together.

Suzie

Resources

Listen to today’s More Than Small Talk podcast (Episode #16) on KLRC.com podcast network or on your favorite podcast app.

Resource mentioned in podcast today is Fiercehearted by Holley Gerth.

Hey friend, if you enjoyed today’s post, you might find these blog posts helpful as well.

*An Open Letter to Women: Let’s be strong together

* When You Feel Less Than Strong

What God says about helping the helpless . .

by 4 Comments

The book of Amos is not an easy read because it shows a side of God we don’t often talk about. Within the pages, it’s clear that God is frustrated with his people.

They think he is distant. He is near. They think he wants rituals and tradition. He longs for communion. They think he cares about a public display of religion, while he calls them out over and over for their unfair treatment of the needy and their lack of justice. 

God cares about how we treat him — and how we treat others.

Three years ago I was in a place of absolute cynicism. It felt like the world was a mess. I sensed him leading me away from looking at all that was wrong with the world, to lean into what was good. That’s when the LFT Compassion projects were birthed.

[Read more…]

31 prayer starters when you don’t know what to say to God {{plus a free Ebook}}

by 1 Comment

Years ago I discovered that if I would just sit with God and start the conversation with him, something opened up.

Sometimes I used scripture. Other times I pulled a line from a devotional that resonated deeply and spoke that out loud. As time passed, I started calling these prayer starters.

In today’s episode of More Than Small Talk podcast, Holley, Jennifer and I discussed how hard can be to ask for help. While our focus was asking people for help, some of those same challenges arise when talking to God.

So today, as promised, I am sharing 31 prayer starters. Most are right in this post, but I am also including a free gift of a printable prayer Ebook — just for you.

[Read more…]

I threw away my Superwoman cape a long time ago

by 8 Comments

I’m not strong all the time. In fact, there are areas where I’m weak. Like geography. Like dancing (I’m so awkward). Like patience.

And yet I’m still a strong woman.

I dance in my living room all the time. I have my own particular hip sway that makes my littles giggle. I love travel and experiencing new cultures, but I’m okay with the fact that I can’t name every country.

And patience? That’s an area where God has brought me a long, long way. It doesn’t come natural, but he is supernaturally doing a work in me.

Listen, no one person is strong in everything all the time. When we require that of ourselves or others, it’s exhausting. And if we were all strong in every area we wouldn’t need each other. When we acknowledge that we aren’t strong in every area, we give ourselves permission to delight in those strengths that God naturally placed in us. We can learn and grow in those areas where we are weaker.

We can also delight in the strengths of others.

  • This is my Audrey and her superhero strength is that she’s tender-hearted and kind.

I threw away my Superwoman cape a long time ago but I’m still strong — not because of what I can do, or who I am, or how many countries I can name — but because of the Spirit inside of me.

And so are you.

In today’s episode of More Than Small Talk podcast, Holley and Jennifer and I answer a confession question about this very topic. The four things that stood out to me as we went deep was:

  • Turning to God in our weakness is strength
  • God has uniquely gifted us
  • We are stronger together
  • It’s okay to ask for help

I hope you’ll join our growing community of friends listening to the podcast. I’d also love to hear about your strength and how you lean in to the Lord in those areas that are weaker.

And if geography is your strength, tell me how many countries you can list. Ready, set, go!

Suzie

Related Resources

Listen to More Than Small Talk podcast on iTunes, KLRC.com, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app.

In today’s episode we listed these resources:

On those days when real life feels hard

by 10 Comments

One of the biggest traps for those in the public eye is to somehow show the world that your life is picture perfect. Every post. Every photo. Every tagline offers a glimpse of all the good parts.

While the good parts are worth celebrating, the problem with a picture-perfect life is that it leaves others feeling as if they’ve failed or fallen short. After all, she just had a hard day or a series of hard days and it may leave her asking:

Am I doing something wrong?

Does God see me too?

Can I tell you something? I love my life. So much. Yet there are days when it’s really hard. Yesterday was one of those days. I found myself in a doctor’s office waiting to hear results on someone I love.

It was a day when I had a list of things to do, and not one of them got marked off.

It was a day when a little one got really upset and I didn’t know how to make it better. In fact, there’s a good chance I made it worse simply because I didn’t know what to do.

[Read more…]

If we loved others like we love ourselves, what would that look like?

by 6 Comments

In today’s Encouragement for Today, I remind us that there should be room for imperfection as we love others.

But can we be honest? This is a struggle as we love ourselves too.

What if we loved others like we loved ourselves? What would that look like? For some, we’d set the bar so high there’s no way to ever come close. We don’t allow imperfection or failure, because that’s not allowed.

No, we don’t do this to others. Why do we do it to ourselves?

For some, if we treated others like we do ourselves we’d beat them up silently, exposing them to thoughts of shame and comparison. There’d be no relief from the constant critique.

Of course we don’t do this to others, so why do we do it to ourselves?

Loving ourselves is not a concept that is easy to wrap our brain around. In yesterday’s More Than Small Talk podcast, Holley, Jennifer, and I really struggled at first to talk about this. It felt awkward and a little self-serving to talk about loving ourselves, but eventually we pushed through.

I’m glad we did.

[Read more…]