Have you ever had a conflict with someone, and it was all their fault?
A few years ago I wrestled with feelings of helplessness over a close relationship that wasn’t as strong as it should be. I determined that I would work on the relationship. That I would use good communication tools. That I’d refuse to engage.
But then I butted heads with this person again. And again. It just seemed impossible.
It’s not my fault, I reasoned. I’m not the one being aggressive. I’m not the one who is easily offended.
One day as I prayed, God gently showed me something: I wasn’t treating this person the same as I would others.
What? That’s not true. I’m doing all the right things. I’m saying the right things.
Not in your heart, you’re not.
That day I resolved not to outwardly change, but to begin to change on the inside. [Read more…]