Where’s your safe place?
My friend Angye asked that just yesterday.
I told her it was when my hands are in the soil. Or when I’m kayaking or hiking.
There’s something about gardening and nature that calms me. I feel safe. When you face loss, it may feel that there’s no safe place at all, but there is, sweet friend.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (Matt. 11:28-29 NIV)
Jesus describes a safe place for all of us. It’s a place where we can take those troubled thoughts. Those questions that we can’t answer and they are driving us crazy. In that safe place, we can express our thoughts to our Savior. Let Him weep with us. Let Him show us that He is near.
Write those thoughts in a journal
Journaling helps you look back.
On those days when it feels like you have a million miles to go, you can look back and see how far you’ve come.
You see where the weight began to fall off. Where pain turned to surprising joy. Where you laughed again. Where the memories sweetness began to mix with sorrow.
Journaling allows you to put in words what you might not be able to say out loud, or to express thoughts that you feel but aren’t comfortable saying to others — not yet.
Accept his peace, even when you don’t feel it yet
“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.” (John 14:27, NLT)
This is our promise.
Peace comes as God mourns with you.
Or in that moment when ,like Jennifer (see yesterday’s post), you realize that the widow and you have integrated and you are no longer fragile, or your grief has turned into compassion for others who are fragile.
You are stronger than you know
He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” (Isa. 40:29-31, NLT)
You feel weak, but you got up this morning. Celebrate that strength.
You are hurting, but you smiled today. Celebrate that joy.
You wonder if God is a thousand miles away, but you talked to him anyway, because you believe he’s listening. That’s faith.
Healing after loss comes in waves, in moments, over years. It’s a process and that’s OK. In every part of it, you’ll discover how strong you’ve been all along, and how your faith carries you.
Healing isn’t forgetting that loved one. It’s remembering the good. The gift. And allowing sorrow to take its course all the way to peace.
Read the Introduction and Chapter One of The Mended Heart, just for you.
Being hurt and heartbroken is a sad reality for most of us. But I’m so thankful for this treasure of a book written by my friend Suzie Eller. Page by page, Suzie will help you understand how God’s truth can heal your pain so you can move forward whole and healed. – Lysa TerKeurst, New York Times Bestselling Author and President of Proverbs 31 Ministries