Have you ever had someone point out a problem and your instant response is, “That’s them, not me.”
The problem with that is that very rarely is it all the other person’s responsibility for the wrong.
Wait a minute, Suzie.
What about cases of addiction, where that person controls the situation with their destructive behavior?
What about the girl who can’t seem to control her tongue? That’s not my fault, right?
It’s not about fault. That’s key.
It’s about examining your part in a continual battle. Maybe your part is to stop allowing another person’s addiction to define your life. Maybe it’s praying for that girl and for your relationship, or being truthful with a gentle response instead of listening and walking away irked.
We can only change our contribution to the relationship, so pointing fingers at everyone else leaves us just as stuck as the other person.
So, today. Stop pointing. Stop saying it’s everyone else’s issues that create the conflict. How can you grow through this? Not easy, right? I so get that, because it’s right where I have been at times (more than I want to be).
Let’s change the lingo from “It’s them, not me” to “It’s us, change me”.