I have been married 11 years and it has been less than ideal. Things have gotten worse over the years with my husband constantly hurting me and letting our family down. I know I need to forgive for us to ever make it, but it is so hard when it happens daily. I know I need to give it to God and stop letting the anger build up in me. I so need Him right now.
I hear you.
I pray that you hear me as well. Forgiveness isn’t allowing someone to continue to harm you, sis.
Sometimes what we perceive to be forgiveness is actually allowing a person to continue to walk further away from God’s best for him as we grant him permission to harm, to lie, to let down. None of that is God’s plan for him.
And it’s not God’s plan for you.
Turning the other cheek is meeting evil with dignity, with mercy, but it’s not allowing evil to run rampant. Perhaps it is a good time to talk to a godly counselor (someone who is licensed and can give you tools to set boundaries and to meet this behavior with loving and merciful strength). Perhaps it’s time to surrender to God what you cannot change, and allow Him to begin to teach and encourage and show you what to do that is healthful and good.
You and your children are worthy of kindness and promises that are kept. Forgiving is definitely part of healing in a troubled marriage, but it’s so key that you understand what it means, and what it doesn’t.
And I pray that God is so near to You today and every day hereafter. I pray that You sense Him in an entirely and fresh new way. He loves you. So much. You are worthy of consistent and faithful love, and God gives each of us that.
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