If your trust has been betrayed, the thought of forgiving might make you feel vulnerable, not just with that person but with God.
From page 62: Give yourself permission to be honest with God, but with the understanding that there’s nothing in Scripture that condones unfaithfulness. It’s not in God’s plan or His character. And if this same God grieves over the fallen sparrow (Matthew 10:29) then He grieves over your broken relationship.
He is big enough to handle your honesty while leading you to a new level of spiritual joy and intimacy and even tender vulnerability with Him.
Today, write it out. Share your feelings honestly with God.
You can journal those feelings.
You can share those feelings out loud with Him in your place of prayer.
You can write a letter to Him.
Now, release it.
That doesn’t mean that you try to feel a certain way.
You open your hands and heart and release it to Him. . . so He can begin to take up residence in the raw and wounded places.
It’s one small step toward an omniscient God whose been waiting to take those feelings for a very long time.
Is this the end? Does it mean you’ve forgiven and will never feel this way again?
But it does mean that you know where to go when your “temple” is battered and bruised so He can fill you up all over again. And again. And again, until there’s little room left for anything but Him and the peace that His presence brings.