My mom was only 15 when she found out she was pregnant.
When she told her mother that she was pregnant, her mom said, “You made your bed, now lie in it.”
She married the boy.
A couple of years later she lost that child to a childhood illness. She gave birth to a second child when she was 18. She was far from home. Her young husband was in the navy. She felt alone and isolated most of the time.
When he came home on leave they fought and the fights got physical.
One day she couldn’t take it anymore so she grabbed the hand of her three-year-old and left. He found her a few weeks later. He brought roses. They argued. She told him she was done with the marriage and the unfaithfulness and the abuse. He assaulted her and then left forever.
Six weeks later she discovered that she was pregnant.
He had shown her who was boss after all. She could go back to him or try to make it alone. She chose to make it alone.
This last month I watched the secretly taped videos involving Planned Parenthood and I wept.
When my mom found out she was pregnant, life was hard. She was a single mom to a 3-year-old. She cleaned houses to make a living. She was 21-years-old with no support system. When her labor started, she walked to the hospital, one hand holding that of her little girl’s and the other clutching her belly. There were no pink balloons. No announcements arriving in the mail. No flowers. No cameras snapping images of the moment.
I have compassion for those who don’t know what to do when they find out they are pregnant, especially in situations like my own mother’s.
I totally believe that if we speak out about abortion, as women we better be ready to step into the gap with other women. We must be compelled to help or love those babies when they are born.
They can’t do it alone. It’s why abortion is so appealing to many.
I grieve for women who have had an abortion and would give anything to reverse that decision.
I get it. It’s hard. I’m not here to point a finger at my sisters, but after watching those videos I had to speak out.
I can’t help but say that I will always choose life.
Because that little girl born to my mom was me.
My mother’s brave decision allowed me to choose whether my life was of value or not.
Was life easy? It wasn’t. It was really, really hard at times.
Yet I’m forever grateful that my upbringing or circumstances didn’t define whether my life was worth preserving, for if my mom had ended her pregnancy she would have ended me. And my children. And their children after them.
That’s why I choose life.
Because that pregnancy produced that little girl who played in the mud in the picture above.
And it produced the woman I have become.
I love being Suzie. I love being a mom. I love sharing my faith. I love hiking. I love being in the arms of Richard. I love my grandbabies.
I love life.
I love talking with you right here even if you see it differently.
In the past seven years of writing this blog, you won’t find me speaking out on issues of politics or current debates. I’m a private girl on those issues and, in most cases if I disagree it’s a matter of prayer.
So, this is rare for me but every life matters, I believe that strongly.
Watching these videos forces us to ask hard questions. It forced me, as a woman who could have once been classified as an unfortunate pregnancy, to speak out. To ask that we take another look at abortion and what it has become.
Surely we can find a better solution than this. As women we are smart. We’re brave. We’re resourceful.
We can do better.
To find a local pregnancy center
Bethany Christian Services – Considering adoption? This is a an option. (Our family has been blessed with two beautiful sweet grandchildren through adoption.)
If you know of a compassionate post-abortion ministry for women, would you share that here?
What is one tangible way that we can reach out to a woman who is pregnant and in a hard circumstance?
As a teenager and young adult, I was always pro-choice. I didn’t have a strong relationship with God and I thought, “If I was ever in that situation, I couldn’t handle it! I’d definitely get an abortion”. I am 21 now and have really grown with God. I still have a pretty irrational fear of pregnancy, but I can’t say with such certainty that I’d choose an abortion. In fact, I feel I’d much rather be grateful for this opportunity to rely on God.
Just because I feel this way, I know other women don’t. Therefore, I don’t judge women who do seek abortions and I don’t want to deny them the opportunity. This does produce some conflict for me. I agree with personal freedom so I am pro-choice, but, biblically, I know abortion isn’t what God would want. I don’t know how to balance this some times because it seems to be an unpopular opinion for a Christian to have.
I think the balance is that we don’t just point out what we believe to be wrong, but that we step in to make a difference. My two beautiful adopted grandbabies are a gift from two women who chose to give them life. I can’t imagine our family without these sweet boys. I can’t imagine the world without them.
We open our homes.
We open our heart.
We understand the difficulty that comes with choosing life.
We offer compassion and healing for those who regret past choices.
We have honest conversations.
We respond with tangible action wrapped in compassion and hope.
I give your mom a standing ovation for her courage and strength and unlseflish love. She could just think of herself and rid of you. But she chose love. She chose you.
Imagine that. I wouldn’t be visiting a blog like this ‘cos it wouldn’t have existed. My gosh. The world is a better place because your mom chose life.
Let’s continue to choose life! 🙂
Suzie, You are indeed special.. Thank God your mum choose life. I too am learning not to focus on my circumstances, the brokeness and praying God use them for His good. It’s only then I could find life purposeful and meaningful.
May the Lord continue to use you in a powerful way!
Thank you for sharing my grandmother went through something similar. Thank God that he saw thoe woman through or you and I wouldn’t be here. God bless.
“I totally believe that if we speak out about abortion, as women we better be ready to step into the gap with other women. We must be compelled to help or love those babies when they are born.” <— These words say it ALL, Suzie…. YES! Oh, this is so beautiful. Thank you.
There is no word to express my respect for your boldness. I thank God for the Holy Spirit that has endowed us with boldness that has overtaken the shame, incompleteness and deceit regarding our past. May you forever be truthful and continue to live under the shadow of the Almighty God who has given you the grace to share this private moments with us. You are truly blessed. Thank you for sharing because you really touched my nerve in a good way.
Thanks, Bola. My kudos go out to my mom who struggled but survived. I’m proud of her.
Yes. Just yes. Thank you Suzie. And thank you to your mom. And thank you to God for the love that pours out of your heart.
And thank you to my mom, whomever, wherever you are, for choosing life.. which included the unbelievably difficult decision to also choose adoption.
Sweet. Sharing our stories is more helpful than passing judgement.