M.D. (Melissa) Bronson guest posts today and I can’t wait for you to meet her. She shares her story of living free and climbing out of a discomfort zone many of us we’ll identify with.
We all have those places, right?
I love this story. I really like Melissa. I think you will too. ~ Suzie
“Your water’s broke,” my doctor said.
I sat. Already 10 days overdue, you’d think I’d be running to the hospital. But, I just sat.
“What’s the matter?” said my husband.
“I’m afraid,” I said.
“Oh, it’ll be fine,” said my doctor. “You’ll be great.”
Will it? I thought. Will I?
I wasn’t afraid of the delivery. I wasn’t afraid of having a baby; I was afraid of having a baby.
A person.
A little human being in my arms and home and life who’d rely on me for everything.
I have no idea how to do this. No idea.
I’d been fairly resourceful up to that point in my life. I could figure things out. Most times, with enough thinking and research, viable solutions lay not too far from the problem. Of course, the biggest problem lurking behind all these solutions was my own pride.
I hadn’t come up with a solution for that, yet.
Enter motherhood.
Foreign, terrifying territory. For me, nothing has been more humbling than mothering. Children do things we cannot understand in ways we’d never predict. They steal our hearts and fill them with unexplainable passion. And they push our limits and test our resources beyond our wildest imagination.
They place this tiny person in your arms and say, “Go, now. Raise her. Teach her. Love her. And, by the way, you’re responsible, in part, for the development of her eternal soul. Congratulations!”
Oh, dear. I can’t do this. I struggle enough as it is.
I don’t eat enough kale. I turn right when they tell me to turn left. How will I know if she’s eating enough? What if the water’s too hot?
Where is the manual!
That’s when the devil comes running. He smells fear and insecurity and feeds both. Before we know it, we’re under attack every waking moment. Questioning the calling, fighting boredom and expectation, and constantly wondering – What if I mess this up?
Motherhood is no picnic. It’s spiritual battle. It’s uncomfortable. It requires us to fall on our knees with open, empty hands and plead with our Father for wisdom, discernment, grace, and the will to fight.
God brought His solution to my pride in the form of small human beings. {Tweet This}
Little ones who call me mama. Through them, these children, God’s humbled me, revealed both my futility and His absoluteness. He’s wiped pride’s tar and revealed Grace. He used ignorance to shake and break me. He’s spilled me of myself so that He might fill me of Himself.
When we finally resist ourselves, shelve our pride, ambition, control, and look to Him, He equips. We see it’s our Father Who’s placed these children – His children – in our care. He, in mercy and with grace, strengthens us for the battle.
It’s been almost 14 years since that first one landed in my arms. As I look back, I’m amazed. It’s hard to recognize that young, frightened woman in the doctor’s office.
She had no idea the path that lay before her. Not an easy one, but every step with her Abba Father.
And every step with Him is so good.
M.D. Bronson
M.D. Bronson is mother to four daughters. She’s wife and sister and daughter and friend. She thinks too much about things that don’t matter and too little about the things that do.
If someone asked her, “What are a few of your favorite things?” she’d say, “There’s nothing like a really, deep breath. Digging in dirt. Holding my daughters’ hands. Sharp pencils. Seeing my Father’s hand spin Life in and around me. Oh, and words. I love words.”
She also wears a fanny pack sometimes.
Get to know Melissa better on her blog (you’ll be glad you did).
I have read so much about motherhood and heard stories from friends. Nothing can really prepare you for motherhood. But I’m sure you won’t be there if it’s not for you. God will equip you as He’s called you. 🙂
Simply beautiful. Powerful for this momma heart.
Thank you for the encouragement, Jodie! Praise God, and many blessings to you along the journey. Holy work – every day!
“Through them, these children, God’s humbled me, revealed both my futility and His absoluteness.” Great post from your beautiful mama heart. Have a blessed week, MD and Suzie!
Thank you, sweet friend. 🙂
This is pure loveliness! Thank you for sharing your heart, Melissa; loved this! And Suzie, thanks for opening your space to friends… you are incredible! #RockThatFannyPackGirl
And, YOU, are kind. Suzie is kind. I love my fanny pack, by the way. I have to write about it sometime.
🙂
Beautiful! And from a woman who faithfully enters the battle each day reliant on her Abba Father. One who has faced and overcome trial in God’s victory and uses it all for His glory! Keep writing! A.H.
I cannot thank you enough for this note. You know me, but I can’t figure out who you are! 🙂
Whoever, you’ve encouraged me. God strengthens His people THROUGH His people. Thank you!
I just loved that! It brought back so many memories for me as a young mother from years ago!
Thank you so much for sharing your heart! Loved this post!
Thank you, Karie. 🙂
Oh, I love, love, love this, Melissa. Many of us have walked a familiar trail. I recall *freaking out* at the hospital, thinking, “What do we do with him now?!” “Him” is now 16 and is turning into a young man. I’m hitting my knees a bit more lately, but there’s a grand future in store. Oh, and your writing contains such fun wit. What an enjoyable visit here!
So true! They grow up, and with God’s help, the journey is so much more than survival. Thank you, Kristi, for the encouragement. :-).
I recently became a mother to 2 teenagers who I love so very much!! I wouldnt have thought that I could have this much love to give but I’m so thankful that I do!!! Lately (actually today mai ly) I’ve been really really struggling with my role as their mother. I get frustrated with them so easily over things that I think they should know to do or not to do, things they should be doing or ways they should be acting based on how I was brought up. I tend to forget that they were not raised in the same house I was with the same parents and rules. They aren’t the same as me (which I’m thankful for) but I struggle to remember that. I sorry time and time again that I’m not doing a good job, that I’m not helping them learn how to deal with life orhow to mature and treat others right. I hope they see Gid through me but I know that thy don’t sometimes. Sometimes I lose my temper and smart off or yell at them when I know it’s wrong and I feel awful afterwards. Sometimes I just feel so frustrated… I want to enforce rules but I want them to know I love them!!! I REALLY needed this today! Thank you!!!
Exactly how I felt and still feel sometimes. I need the Lord for guidance, strength, patience, and well, everything that comes with being a parent. In fact lately its been very hard to not be focused on me. I’m tired and just want me time. However thats not happening and I feel like in those moments I can’t seem to focus on being a good mom. Listening to my son…really listening, and following through when theres a consequence. I’m burnt out and oh how I need the Lord right now .
As a side note- best bio ever. I truly enjoy it. Sarcasm, sas, reality, and kindness in one pretty package.