I met her when she was 10. I was her teacher in church. We reconnected online a year or so ago, But then I got to hug her in person at the Come With Me retreat last month.
Can you tell how much I love this woman?
Today Shannon Geurin shares her 13th Disciple story. It’s how a flawed disciple rediscovered her voice.
It’s her “Come With Me” invitation and what happened when she said yes. ~ Suzie
My 13th Disciple Story
I love that the twelve disciples were ordinary, human men.
They had flaws. Peter was loud and obnoxious. John was slightly competitive. Thomas struggled with unbelief. While others were in the spotlight, Andrew was mostly behind the scenes.
I don’t know about you, but I can identify with each one of these character traits.
When I look at myself in the mirror, I see a woman with so many flaws. So many that there is no way she could ever be considered a 13th disciple.
Can be real with you?
My flesh says that because of a mistake that I made several years ago that I am unworthy to be doing what I am doing.
Not only that, being a 13th disciple is a major reach.
I know what you are saying to yourself right now.
“How can you say that, when Christ forgave you the moment you repented? Not only that, He has forgotten it!”
Oh my friends. Yes. Yes, I know. I know what the Bible tells me. And I believe every word, I really do. But, I guess I’m one of his “high-maintenance” chicks, because daily I battle the war that Satan tries to wage in my mind and in my thoughts about not being good enough.
Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily, and follow me. Luke 9:23
Take up your cross daily.
Die to self and follow Him no matter the cost.
Following Him and being that 13th disciple is a DAILY thing. Every day we have a choice. Will we walk in the flesh or will we walk in the spirit? It’s our decision.
And there is a cost.
Jesus had grown in popularity during His final days. Thousands came to hear Him speak. Even so, truly following Him wasn’t glamorous, and He wanted to make sure they knew that it came with a cost.
Are you sure? ’cause I don’t even have a place to lay my head at night. Luke 9:58
What is your cost?
Jesus spoke to me very clear not too long ago.
Shannon, there is a cost to sharing your story.
There will be darts thrown your way. You can take them, because of me.
Follow me.
That’s my cost, or one of them. The darts that will come my way. Sharing a story like mine is a scary thing. It causes all kinds of emotions to arise, both good and bad, and people can be hurtful.
Very hurtful.
Some are hurtful without even knowing it. I call it innocent ignorance.
I’m not gonna lie. Some of those darts will also be self-inflicted. I’m hard on myself.
There are more costs, and I’ve counted them.
But then there’s this:
I have given you authority over all the power of the enemy and you can walk among snakes and scorpians and crush them! Nothing will injure you! Luke 10:19
Is there anyone out there who wants to crush some snakes and scorpians with me? I don’t know about you, but reading this scripture causes a fierceness to rise up within me.
It makes me want to shout: I am woman, hear me roar!
Jesus is saying, “GET UP GIRLS!”
It’s time to RISE!
Come with me.
What ever it is that is holding you back — fear, disease, hurt, grief, etc.
Get up and come with me.
In Luke 9:58 (see above) I believe Jesus was tired of people waffling around on whether they wanted to follow him or not. And then another instance when He found the disciples sleeping in the Garden of Gethsemane.
I bet his eyes were rolling.
Come on boys! Could you not stay awake?
As much as this annoyed Jesus, I simply adore it because it shows the humanity of the disciples.
You see where I’m going?
You don’t have to make your life perfect before you follow Him! And it certainly isn’t about works. No one ever became a disciple because of works.
Following Him doesn’t mean you’re perfect;
it means you’re flawed in every way
Jesus says, “come with me.”
And even though we are flawed, we rediscover our voice.
I say yes.
What about you?
Shannon
Thanks for sharing your story, Shannon! Very powerful! #livefree
Thank you for taking the time to read, Pam! Have a wonderful day!
Thank you Shannon, for sharing your story. You are brave, and you are beautiful! Thank you for the inspiration to not be afraid to be bold and #livefree!
Thank you for your encouraging, life-giving words Rachelle! God wants his girls to #livefree today and everyday!!
Thank you for sharing your story. So much of what you said resonated with me. I’m off to purchase Suzanne’s book … and I will be following you, too! 😉
Oh Pam YES go purchase it now!! And thank you for your encouragement!
Beautiful, Shannon! Thank you for being bold and brave and sharing your story. May all fiery darts be extinguished as you move forward with His protection surrounding you. Blessings!
Kristine- thank you- and I am claiming everything you just said about those fiery darts! Amen!
LOVE!!! Shannon, it is so hard to speak up sometimes isn’t it? One of the main reasons I didn’t start blogging right away was because I was honestly scared of the voice I had. I knew the darts would come, I had counted that cost. But the darts coming through people was a major insecurity. Still working through that one! Thank you for sharing this. I am encouraged by your words! 💗
Alisa- yes! So hard! The freedom, though, that comes from speaking up is like none other. When we bring things that Satan wants to say in the dark….when we bring those things to light, Jesus gets FULL glory. I’m thankful for you Alisa!
Oh Shannon! You spoke and I heard Jesus asking me again: “Are ya gonna follow me? Yes, there’s a cost! It’s gonna cost your selfishness! Your ‘too busy-ness”! But, if ya will, at the end of the day (and all along this journey), you’ll have this incredible relationship with Me, the One Who loves you unconditionally, the One Who isn’t taking you away from all of YOU but taking you TO peace in your heart and mind, TO joy in your marriage, TO healed relationships. You see, My child, when I asked you to come out into deeper waters with Me, I reminded you that I can see what’s under that water!” That’s just some of what He spoke into my heart. Thank you for your openness and for sharing your story. I love you a whole bunch, Shannon, but only a little compared to how much Jesus loves you. And Me.
Awww Shirlene- You’re such a amazing woman! I love it when Jesus speaks directly to our hearts like this. Thank you for reading! I pray God blesses your socks off today!!
I love your transparency, Shannon! Your story is beautiful and powerful; thank you for sharing! What an honor it is to know you, sweet friend 🙂
Crystal- your words are LIFE GIVING. Hope you know that– you have a beautiful way with them that TOUCH me. I love you so much! and….seriously..the honor is all mine!
I am of a like mind. I love writing about how Jesus challenges me. I feel a call to be a better parent; so I am getting up and arming myself for the battle. Thank you for the inspiration.
Yay Mary! Get up girl! Put that armor on and fight! Thank you for reading today!
Shannon, I love this. Suzie’s book opened up a whole new world of human imperfection to me and helped me recognize that the disciples were just as flawed as I am. Yet, they were able to do great things because they made the choice to FOLLOW JESUS! What a powerful decision with transformative power. I am so glad that you rediscovered your voice, God is using you. Your story is a powerful testimony of how God can take the broken pieces of our lives and restore them for His glory. Love you, sister!
Yes Sarah! It’s so crazy to me how I have read the bible my whole life, but never really thought of the disciples in this way. I love this movement that Suzie has started and I pray it reaches the tens of thousands of millions. Your words always encourage me. Thank you Sarah! Love you too my sister!
Well this is the second time this morning that my Savior has spoken to my wounded heart and said, “You are my child and I call you worthy and loved.” Thank you for these beautiful words of truth! I also tend to be VERY hard on myself. The enemy has always enjoyed whispering doubt and condemnation into my mind. But long ago – even before the enemy began his work to destroy me – God was working to strengthen and prepare me for battle. God spoke to me in a dream when I was very little. The words He spoke – and the absolute love I felt in His presence – I have never forgotten. They have lifted me up out of very dark battlefields. God has used all of my faults and failures – all my weaknesses and sins – all the things Satan wanted to use against me – to instead draw me nearer to my mighty Savior. Now, He is using those things to bless my life and to work through me to bring His wisdom to others. We are more than conquerors!
Wow Rebecca!!
Why are we so hard on ourselves?? I’m so thankful that that he uses our imperfections and weaknesses for HIS glory. Yes we are MORE than conquerors! I’m bless by you today friend. 🙂
You have no idea how this blessed me. The Holy Spirit is so absolutely amazing when He works in us, and through us. <3 Thank you!
Thanks for sharing your heart with us! Love how Jesus takes our broken pieces and makes something beautiful out of them.
Thank you Lisa. Yes- it’s so amazing how He does that, isn’t it? He makes them into a beautiful tapestry:-)
Thank you for bravely sharing your story, Shannon. It’s so amazing how Jesus wants us to come with all our flaws to Him. Such precious, unconditional love! I’m your neighbor at Lori’s. Blessings and hugs to you!
Hi there Trudy:-) Glad to be neighbors with you- God never ceases to amaze me and I don’t know what people do without Him!
This is so beautiful, Shannon!! I know God is calling me to use my past to His glory but oh those darts from the enemy!! It’s so comforting to know that I’m not alone in this walk! It doesn’t matter what darts others may throw our way if our transparent sharing of our past frees even one person, brings them to the love and freedom in knowing Jesus. Thank you so much for sharing this and the video is a bonus!!
You;re so encouraging Nancy! Thank you:-) and no- you are certainly not alone! He can and will use your past! There have been darts- but the positive feedback I’ve gotten blows all those darts to shame! Thank you for reading!
Don’t you love that God uses us flaws and all! I’m so thankful that He does!
He is using you, Shannon!
Go, Girl!
You are a blessing~
Melanie
Thank you Melanie! xoxoxo
What a powerful post! I wish I wasn’t afraid of the darts! But I love your words “You can take them because of Me.” This was a great reminder to me that in following Jesus I need to seek His will and not the approval of man. Thank God for his spiritual armor which extinguishes all those flaming arrows!
Valerie- the approval of man usually disappoints, right? Yet why do we seek it so much! i’m right there with ya, girl…and that spiritual armor is a must! Amen!
I love the focus of your Come With Me story, Shannon! Who can’t relate to be flawed? And yet, Jesus! So glad we met in person. You are a blessing.
Hi there Julie! I’m glad we met too:-) Here’s something for you— we didn’t talk that much at the retreat, right? Yet I think about you a lot! And when I do it makes me smile and I pray for you.:-) Isn’t that random? Only God! Thank you for your encouragement today and for reading!!!
Shannon how I needed to hear your story today ! I have done horrible things and they have followed me around and been thrown up in my face since I was a child ! I truly felt at times I was a dr. Jelkly and Mr.Hyde personality ! In the past year , through the saving grace of Jesus and god’s word and Susie’s books and blogs and periscope bible studies .I have accepted the forgiveness of my sins and it is sometimes still a style to forgive myself ! Now do not get me wrong , the shame can cast a horrible shadow as I too am hardest on myself ! Each day even when I know I am being attacked by the enemy and his forces ; I now know that my Jesus is more real in my life than ever and his promises from his word are true and he is with me all the time ! My ladies bible study is doing Suzie ‘s newest book ” come with me ” starting June 1st . I have already begun to read it and it has spoke to my heart tremendously ! I want to say thank you because of my past sins that I have truly repented of there are still circumstances that have made it so difficult for me to forgive myself and for others to believe that they can trust me and believe my repentance ! I say the prior not to be critical or pitiful; but this very rejection the enemy uses to tell me that God will never be able to use me for his work or give me a dream or purpose for him ! This lurks around me daily and the enemy throws it in my face has made me feel that God most certainly could not use me for his work ! Especially if I can not be trusted or forgiven by those that I have sinned against ! Yes I have gone to them and asked them to forgive me and not made any excuses for my sins ! The Lord gave me this scripture , Be still and know that I am God ! ” in January ! So I wait and believe but I did feel like how Lord can I explain that to others and still be used by you and bring others to know you as you have shown yourself to me ! I needed your post today so bad ! I appreciate your candidness and am trusting God to work a miracle in the hearts of those I have sinned against ! I want to be his light and be real and your testimony helped me today to push one more day toward believing he can Open doors and use me despite my past sins and failures ! Thank you for your realness from my heart ! 🙏🏻❤️
Oh sweet Miriam- You brought tears to my eyes.. I know exactly how you feel. Our situations may different but I completely understand! In my situation, I deeply hurt others too…some didn’t respond to my apology. I had to learn to accept that I did my part and that it was in Jesus’ hands. And you’re on the right path with following Suzie….she has helped me more than she knows! Keep at it and dig in!
Draw close to God Miriam. Make your relationship with him your absolute priority..HE MAKES THINGS NEW….ALL OF THEM!
Thank you for reading today Miriam!
Shannon, what was meant for evil God redeemed. Thank you for sharing your story and offering hope as the 13th disciple. You are so brave. I was at the retreat. Blessings. Diana
Diana- I know you were at the retreat because I remember you well!!! We were roomies:-) Thank you for your sweet comments!
How inspiring!
We can all be the 13th disciple. All we need is follow God with total faith. Easier said than done but really worth it. 🙂
I know right, Lux? Following him really is the easier way, even though it’s hard sometimes! Hows that for a paradox?? Thanks for your comments!
Shannon, Thank you for pointing us to this beautiful truth. I’m sorry you’re had darts thrown your way. I think we all have something (okay several somethings) that Satan loves to dredge up those guilty feelings over. I’m walking with you, dear friend! Redeemed by love. Covered by grace. A 13th disciple. Blessings and hugs!
And Suzie, I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you from Lori and Shannon I can’t wait to get to know you better.
Thank you Deb! Yes we all have “things,” don’t we? Thanks for walking a long beside me—I’m so grateful that we connected!
What grace that he wants our company, annoyances and all. So glad He wore flesh and understands, making a space for us–and leaving no need for us to be a disciple of works. Works tire, Jesus restores. Nice to see you this morning, Shannon; glad to be your linkup buddy at Susan’s place today. Beautiful post, thanks for sharing. 🙂 ((grace upon grace))
Oh, sweet friend! I treasure you and am so proud of your courage and willingness to go with Him! Thankful beyond words to call you friend ♥
Shannon!!! I LOVED this. There are days that I feel like I get nothing but darts, and that can feel so lonely at times. But, you’re right, you know they’re coming and you push forward anyway. We have to. So blessed by this and knowing that you are in the fight with me. 🙂 So glad I found your 13th Disciple post.