following Jesus


growthtracLast week my article was featured at GrowthTrac. Growthtrac is a great resource for marriages. I’m sharing an excerpt of the article and then I’ll let you read the rest of the story on their site.

Thank you to GrowthTrac for allowing me to share my story.



That time God’s plan didn’t look anything like mine

Richard worked at a factory job for nearly two decades. A part of him — the vibrant part that drew me to him in the beginning — was fading. I encouraged him to move from this job that paid well but robbed him of his personality and energy. When he didn’t, I grew impatient. Then there were the moments when I was just sad.

There were physical implications to standing on concrete for twelve hours at a time, but the shift work messed with Richard’s well-being. This was the change most evident after years of working in the plant. My gregarious husband fell into silence. His theory was that if he opened his mouth, the way he felt inside might escape and affect his family.

I wanted to fix Richard. I wanted to make him leave his job because I was ready for it. I wanted to entice him with smiles and silliness to make him laugh again when he felt like doing anything but.

One night I lay in bed while tears ran down my face. I loved this guy with everything I had in me and I wasn’t going anywhere, but I missed the man I married.

I don’t know why nighttime is when God and I meet most often; perhaps it’s the only time he has my total attention. But Jesus walked into my sadness. I felt him asking me to believe that fixing or manipulating wasn’t the answer, and that there was a plan for Richard.

More so, that plan might not look like mine. It might not take place at the rate I thought it should.


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Yes — and no. There’s a hushed and holy place inside believers where we instinctively understand that God is leading us in one direction or another. But not far away are emotions that shout, “Just fix it. Don’t make me push out in deeper water. Make this easy for me. Do it, God!”

Which would I choose?

Read the rest of the story at Growthtrac – Saying Yes When You Want to Say No | Growthtrac Marriage



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