Every week I meet with several friends for Bible study. Last week I noticed a typo in my study sheet and laughed when the scripture reference landed us nowhere near where I thought it would.
“Okay, ladies. I messed up. Let’s see where this takes us.”
I flipped to the scripture and just for fun I read the verse out loud. Then I saw the words I had written under the verse.
BOLD BLACK LETTERS asking this question:
How in the world did they forget so quickly?
Suddenly tears came. My friends had no idea what was going on, or why my typo led to laughter and tears in a matter of seconds.
Here’s the verse:
Then Jesus called his disciples and told them, “I feel sorry for these people. They have been here with me for three days, and they have nothing left to eat. I don’t want to send them away hungry, or they will faint along the way.”
The disciples replied, “Where would we get enough food here in the wilderness for such a huge crowd?”
Jesus asked, “How much bread do you have?” They replied, “Seven loaves, and a few small fish.”
So Jesus told all the people to sit down on the ground. Then he took the seven loaves and the fish, thanked God for them, and broke them into pieces. He gave them to the disciples, who distributed the food to the crowd. They all ate as much as they wanted. Afterward, the disciples picked up seven large baskets of leftover food.
I wrote the phrase a couple of years ago when I was studying, astounded that the disciples had such major amnesia. You see, they had experienced a pretty major miracle just a few short days earlier. Jesus had fed a massive crowd of 5,000 plus their relatives, and he had very little to work with. In the end, they had baskets left over. But here stood the disciples, shuffling from foot to foot, looking around at the crowd and saying, “Oh word, how are we going to deal with this, Jesus? There’s no food!”
This new problem was the exact same problem as before.
It was the exact same magnitude.
It was the exact same Messiah.
It was the exact same response.
As I read my own words in BOLD BLACK INK, tears came because my husband was diagnosed with cancer not too long ago. It was fresh. It felt big. Way bigger than me. Sure, my faith was there because God is there, but there was a lot of me mixed in, too. My worries about our future. The financial aspects. My guy, who I love like crazy. My children, and my children’s children.
Me.
We were in the midst of processing the news and had told only our children and closest friends. As I read my own words, I realized that it was no accident that I had landed on that page, because it allowed me to ask myself this same question:
How in the world had I forgotten so quickly?
Twenty-three years ago I was diagnosed with Stage 2B metastatic breast cancer. I was a young mama, a young wife. It was a hard time, but also a miraculous time. It wasn’t what we wanted to walk through as a couple. In a million years it wasn’t our choice. And yet we experienced miracle after miracle — most of them behind closed doors as Richard and I prayed and held each other, but at other times in the hardest moments when I felt bare and exposed and afraid.
And now?
It is the exact same situation, except now it’s him instead of me.
It is the exact magnitude. The treatment is as intimidating as the disease.
It is the exact same Savior. He walked with us then. He’ll walk with us now.
It is the exact same response. . . .
and this might be where you disagree.
Suzie, you have no idea how this will all turn out.
You’re right, I don’t. But this is also what I learned in that hard time. Miracles can be an act of healing, but there are other miracles that take place. When I look back at my first miracle, I will always be grateful for my extra years. But it was the overwhelming presence and intimacy of walking closely with Him that stands out as our greatest miracle.
- He took our almost nothing and multiplied it over and over again.
- He took our fears and taught us to trust.
- He turned us toward each other when the emotional intensity wanted to divide.
- He whispered words in our hearts when we were torn and didn’t know what to do.
And perhaps the greatest miracle? It was the depth of trust that settled into my heart, knowing that eternity is real and whether I was healed physically or not, I was a winner either way.
How did I forget so quickly?
It’s because I’m human, just like the guys in this story asking, “Hey, how are we going to do this, Jesus?”
His answer then was this: Together. We’re going to do this together. Give me your almost nothing and let me do the impossible with it.
It’s still our answer today. I don’t know what you are going through, but if you are in a hard place like we are, take a moment to remember the miracles of the past. Speak them out loud if you need.
Remind yourself of who He was then. . . and who He still is today.
Then give him your almost nothing and watch Him do the impossible.
Resource
The Spirit-Led Heart: Living a Life of Love and Faith Without Borders
Living and loving our faith without limits has nothing to do with our own efforts–and it has everything to do with God’s Holy Spirit.
Thank you sweet Jesus, how I needed to be reminded today. Thank you.
Well written and what a Beautiful message! Thanks!
Amen Suzie Eller. I love how you are now remembering and reminding yourself of truth. And, I love how the Lord gently prompted you. He sees your pain and so badly wants to comfort you. He sees your heart and so deeply wants to care for it. He sees your fears and so genuinely wants to cradle them with his truth. This was powerful; I had goose bumps. I know the Lord will take care of you; continue to rest in Him, just like you are already doing. To him be the glory – no matter our circumstances.
We have been walking this path for 14 years of watching and waiting with twice a year bllod work and Dr appointments for my husband. Thank you for this reminder, God is bigger and at work always! I believe one day my husband will one day call Jesus, his Lord and Savior. As wives we have the privilege of standing in the gap for our man and our children and family. May God bring you much peace and love in the waiting process and may we glorify God each day of our walk on this earth for all to see Him!
Dear Suzie,
I am praying for you and your husband. God has a plan.
I find it difficult to see his plan at times when I keep going
Around that same circle with people and relationships.
When I go for my morning walks I talk to God and keeps
saying I Know what your going through, I want you to know
I am with you and I just want you to trust me that I can
Handle this. I want you to close your eyes and look up to me
And visualize the vision I have given you every time a negative
Thought enters your head and I will feel your soul and heart with
Peace and love. This really does help me! Please know I will pray
Every day for your husband and you to have strength and peace.
You know I haven’t read A lot of your emails lately but today I was led to read it. I believe mistakes
Are ok, because it gives us a reason to laugh, and God doesn’t care.
It always gives me a reason to spend more time with God asking Him if he can
Correct it. And Him telling me its OK I understand. I love you beyond all measure and
It will all work out. Don’t beat yourself up! May you and your family have a very Merry
Christmas and A Happy New Year!
LOL Janet Daniel
What a wonderful reminder. I love when God shows us things when we least expect it!
I’ve been going thru some different situations with life changes.
Struggling with not knowing how to proceed and how to respond.
One particular day recently I was having a difficult time, lost my focus.
I went for a walk outside. We have a long driveway out in the country.
So in my walk down the driveway I thru up my hands to God and praised Him for allowing me to experience the beauty around me, and that I didn’t know what to do but I knew that He had this.
I just needed to refocus.
I went back to my home office and began opening the mail.
And the first envelope I opened out popped a red bracelet and the first words I saw:
“God Listens”!!!! and then “Prayer Works”!!!!
Tears immediately started falling, my God, my precious Father sent me a message.
How awesome was that!!
I still loose my focus, and I wear the bracelet to remind me of those precious words He gave me!
Will be praying for you and your family!
I so appreciate your words, always a message that has perfect timing!
Blessings and a Merry Christmas!!
Dear Suzie,
When I read your post the other day about Richard’s diagnosis my heart just sank. I tried to write a response of comfort to you but the words would not come. My prayer is that God will remove the fear of the unknowns and fill your hearts with His comfort and peace. My prayer is that God will speak to you gently and often every day to remind you of His great love for both you and Richard. My prayer is that God will continually reaffirm in your lives how precious you both are to Him. Praying blessings from above upon you and Richard.
marilyn
Suzie, I continue to need your reminders. My miracle needed involves my vision and glaucoma. Any and all prayers are welcomed. I continue to pray for you, because I too can look back at miracles and know God is faithful and yet it is SO easy for fear to creep in and make me forget. May you and your family have a wonderful and blessed Christmas as you remember God’s love for all of us!
Suzie, I have been in the midst of some family matters that are draining every ounce of my being so I finally have taken the time to read your posts…I am going to be praying for Richard, you and your family…named in my daily prayer for God’s Divine Healing Power…Strength…Love…physically, spiritually, and emotionally. I love how this Scripture verse has brought you to speak to us about trusting Jesus! Sometimes I forget and then am reminded about all the times He always has been and is with me, loving me, supporting me and when needed…carrying me! Thank you for inspiring me to read His Word, this special Story and Promise and spend some quiet time thanking Him! God bless you all as you walk this road with Him!
I had to chuckle at the “Speak Your Mind” heading. We girls tend to speak our hearts. We just have to transit through our minds to do it. And , how often is someone brave enough to open that door! LOL! Anyway, I am praying that our God of all grace and glory will give you such a strong sense of His Presence and Peace as you and your family walk this journey you would not choose. I pray that you will be able to stand breathless and amazed at His glory that shines through. May souls be saved and lives changed for His kingdom purposes. May this hard spot be filled with the awe and wonder of our Jesus who can handle all the storms of this life and bring us through-more like Him.May you be on mission for Him as He gives you opportunities to speak a word or pray a prayer for others you meet in this journey. Every time my mom (81 years old) goes to the hospital, we decide it will be a mission trip and we are on the lookout for opportunities to be the hands, feet, and voice of Jesus. This helps us stay focused on Him despite our circumstances. Praying for healing and deliverance as well as His Peace that surpasses all human understanding with joy unspeakable and full of His glory to light your way! Another sister in Jesus, Deborah
Suzie, thank-you for sharing your struggles in accepting God’s providence for your family with your husband’s cancer. I can see how He is using your ministry in ways beyond your expectations through this adversity (multiplying the bread and fish) as you seek to “calm and quiet” yourself (Psalm 131) and find contentment in knowing Christ, that goes beyond your circumstances (Eph. 3:20)
I have never experienced serious illness, but I have a husband who will soon be in a wheelchair…I have just reached the Empty Nest season and was expecting circumstances much different than what we face today, but with God’s grace, I am learning to be content, gaining wisdom as I learn that all our days are numbered (Psalm 90:12), and fixing my eyes not on what is seen, but unseen (2 Cor. 4:18).
I see our common trials as fulfilling these purposes: Jesus summarized the Law in Luke 10:27 “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.” In other words, glorify God (1 Peter 4:11, Cor 10:31) and love your neighbor (2 Cor 1:4…who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God). As you go through these new trials, you are blessing me as your neighbor, using the gifts the Lord has given you in a more public way than I ever could, and thus, fulfilling His purpose for you! (Psalm 138:8). love, in Christ, Janette
Thank you, your words hit home.
Thank you Thank you Thank you!! WOW!! Thanks so much for reminding yourself and for the beautiful story that came out of it!!
Healing is the children’s bread. Jesus is the bread of life and by His Stripes we are Healed. He is the Word made flesh. He sent His Word and healed us. Here take and eat, this is My Body broken for YOU.
Healing belongs to the Body of Christ. He paid for it. We wouldn’t be deceived into thinking that the blood did not cover our sins, we should not allow the symptoms to dissuade us from claiming physical healing. There is a scripture that I believe is perhaps mistranslated. Christ is talking about the Kingdom of God and he says, “The violent take it by force”. I believe a more accurate description is that the “determined one” seizes it by force. He will walk us through, though we would most like to be lifted out. He does the work, our work is to believe and walk on as a victor, for in Him we are. Read the accounts in the gospels of healing. There are many. The Lord always worked with each individual in each account, he never failed to get the result that He desired. He always said that it was “their” faith that made them whole. Disease and Death are not the Lord’s way, He has defeated both and I pray the Body of Christ learns to stand for healing as they stand for eternal life. It is a witness that the world needs to see desperately. I will be praying for your husband’s full recovery. Nothing shall be too hard for God. He desires our well being more than we can comprehend.
Suzanne, I will certainly pray and add your hubby, Richard, to my prayers,God bless and know that there are many people who will know be brought to your blog. I’m a nurse in Roch, ny, who works with our beloved ones at our nursing home. Thank you for your ministry!!!God bless, I just came across your blog thru an email, thanks be to God!!!