13th disciple

My friend, Cindy Krall, joins us today. She’s part of a movement of following Jesus, wherever He leads, whatever He asks.

I love this woman. She’s pretty amazing and funny. Today she shares her experience of following Jesus as the 13th disciple.

What does that mean?cindykrall

It simply means that we step into the Bible and see it with fresh eyes. We listen to Jesus and watch His example. We watch the disciples interact with Jesus with the understanding that they had no idea where this relationship would take them.

Then we ask how His words and following Him impacts us today, and begin to live it. ~ Suzie


I’m The Thirteenth Disciple

Sometimes when I want a thought to really take root I repeat it. Out loud. Each time emphasizing a different word.

I am the thirteenth Disciple.

I am the thirteenth Disciple.

I am the thirteenth Disciple.

You get the drift. Funny thing. This time no matter which word I lent force to nothing resonated.

Until I got to the punctuation mark.

I am the thirteenth Disciple.

I am the thirteenth Disciple!

I am the thirteenth Disciple?

Can you guess where I landed? Yup. Big. Fat. Question mark.

Lovely. (Not really.) That’s not where I wanted my “exercise” to go. But Jesus has never been one to be fooled. What followed was an honest conversation between Him and me.


Jesus: Well, Sis. I have to ask. What makes you doubt you are my 13th disciple?

Me: My poor resume’?

Jesus: I see. You consider your lack of qualifications an issue?

Me: Got me there. I know better. You’ve always taken what little I had to offer and done good things. No, it’s not my resume. I think it’s my lack of commitment.

Jesus: Now we’re getting somewhere.

Me: When I think of a disciple I think of someone who lives in Africa. Someone who’s given their all to follow you.

Jesus: So you’re Pastor who lives over on Ninth Street isn’t following me?

Me: Of course not! That’s not what I mean!

Jesus: Then what do you mean?

Me: I mean that deep in my gut I know I haven’t given you everything. I can’t seem to move forward wholeheartedly and embrace whatever it is you call me to. I’m too afraid of leaving…letting go of everyone, everything I hold dear.

Jesus: I know sweetie. I’ve always known.


When I was a little girl I dreamed of missions. And then I learned two things about myself.

  • I don’t like dirt.
  • I didn’t want to leave my family.

I’ve come to terms with the first one. (I’m the pretentious one who when volunteering in church nursery knew her children would never have snot on their faces. I have been humbled. I’ve learned I can deal with boogers and dirt.)

And then there is the second issue.

A sigh involuntarily escapes as I type.

Leaving my family is hard for me.

Seriously girlfriends, I’m not sure what my problem is. Over inflated sense of being needed? My peeps make me laugh? I’d be lost without them?

All I really know is that becoming a thirteenth disciple has always sounded like leaving home.

Enter Suzie Eller.

Her book, Come With Me, tells the story of the disciple Matthew.

She shares in chapter two that Matthew (the Levite) had gotten side-tracked. His pursuits had taken him away from what he and his family were destined to be.

Priests. Mediators. Bearers of hope.

When Jesus said to Matthew, “Come with me” it was an invitation for Matthew to come home. He had been invited to be in the place he was meant to be, doing the things he was meant to do.

Suzie explained how important it was to recognize that Matthew’s calling wasn’t about what he was being asked to leave. It wasn’t about a departure. It was about an arrival.

Matthew was coming home.

Today when Jesus says to me, “Cindy, will you be my thirteenth disciple?” I don’t hear, “So you can leave your loved ones and all you care about behind.”

Instead I hear… “So you can come home.”


It’s not about a departure. It’s about an arrival.

How about you? When Jesus says to you “Come with me” does anything hold you back?

Rest assured, He gets it. His call will be as unique for you as it was for me. His invitation is open and personalized.

Your Heading Towards Home, DoAhead Friend,



doaheadwomanFollow Cindy at DoAheadWoman.com







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