My friend, Cindy Krall, joins us today. She’s part of a movement of following Jesus, wherever He leads, whatever He asks.
I love this woman. She’s pretty amazing and funny. Today she shares her experience of following Jesus as the 13th disciple.
What does that mean?
It simply means that we step into the Bible and see it with fresh eyes. We listen to Jesus and watch His example. We watch the disciples interact with Jesus with the understanding that they had no idea where this relationship would take them.
Then we ask how His words and following Him impacts us today, and begin to live it. ~ Suzie
I’m The Thirteenth Disciple
Sometimes when I want a thought to really take root I repeat it. Out loud. Each time emphasizing a different word.
I am the thirteenth Disciple.
I am the thirteenth Disciple.
I am the thirteenth Disciple.
You get the drift. Funny thing. This time no matter which word I lent force to nothing resonated.
Until I got to the punctuation mark.
I am the thirteenth Disciple.
I am the thirteenth Disciple!
I am the thirteenth Disciple?
Can you guess where I landed? Yup. Big. Fat. Question mark.
Lovely. (Not really.) That’s not where I wanted my “exercise” to go. But Jesus has never been one to be fooled. What followed was an honest conversation between Him and me.
**
Jesus: Well, Sis. I have to ask. What makes you doubt you are my 13th disciple?
Me: My poor resume’?
Jesus: I see. You consider your lack of qualifications an issue?
Me: Got me there. I know better. You’ve always taken what little I had to offer and done good things. No, it’s not my resume. I think it’s my lack of commitment.
Jesus: Now we’re getting somewhere.
Me: When I think of a disciple I think of someone who lives in Africa. Someone who’s given their all to follow you.
Jesus: So you’re Pastor who lives over on Ninth Street isn’t following me?
Me: Of course not! That’s not what I mean!
Jesus: Then what do you mean?
Me: I mean that deep in my gut I know I haven’t given you everything. I can’t seem to move forward wholeheartedly and embrace whatever it is you call me to. I’m too afraid of leaving…letting go of everyone, everything I hold dear.
Jesus: I know sweetie. I’ve always known.
**
When I was a little girl I dreamed of missions. And then I learned two things about myself.
- I don’t like dirt.
- I didn’t want to leave my family.
I’ve come to terms with the first one. (I’m the pretentious one who when volunteering in church nursery knew her children would never have snot on their faces. I have been humbled. I’ve learned I can deal with boogers and dirt.)
And then there is the second issue.
A sigh involuntarily escapes as I type.
Leaving my family is hard for me.
Seriously girlfriends, I’m not sure what my problem is. Over inflated sense of being needed? My peeps make me laugh? I’d be lost without them?
All I really know is that becoming a thirteenth disciple has always sounded like leaving home.
Enter Suzie Eller.
Her book, Come With Me, tells the story of the disciple Matthew.
She shares in chapter two that Matthew (the Levite) had gotten side-tracked. His pursuits had taken him away from what he and his family were destined to be.
Priests. Mediators. Bearers of hope.
When Jesus said to Matthew, “Come with me” it was an invitation for Matthew to come home. He had been invited to be in the place he was meant to be, doing the things he was meant to do.
Suzie explained how important it was to recognize that Matthew’s calling wasn’t about what he was being asked to leave. It wasn’t about a departure. It was about an arrival.
Matthew was coming home.
Today when Jesus says to me, “Cindy, will you be my thirteenth disciple?” I don’t hear, “So you can leave your loved ones and all you care about behind.”
Instead I hear… “So you can come home.”
It’s not about a departure. It’s about an arrival.
How about you? When Jesus says to you “Come with me” does anything hold you back?
Rest assured, He gets it. His call will be as unique for you as it was for me. His invitation is open and personalized.
Your Heading Towards Home, DoAhead Friend,
Cindy
Follow Cindy at DoAheadWoman.com
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Laura Polk’s #13thDisciple Story: Am I Worthy?
Beautiful, Cindy!! Thanks for sharing! #livefree <3
Beautiful story Cindy! Thank you!
It was so wonderful to see and hear you this morning Cindy! I don’t know why but “coming home” keeps reasonating in my mind. Almost like God is saying, “anywhere you follow me will be home”. Can’t wait to see you friend!
Isn’t it funny (in a wonderful way) how the Holy Spirit speaks to us so uniquely? “Coming Home” has really resonated for me too. It’s such a huge comfort for me knowing that anywhere I follow Him is home!
I cried! I — on purpose — didn’t listen to the video until today. I love your story of coming home.
Thank you for penning the words that opened my eyes to the invitation. SO grateful!
Love this, Cindy! God is teaching me that home isn’t just geographical. Your post and video are very encouraging
You’re right! It isn’t geographical! I’m so grateful it brought you encouragement!
I love you, Cindy! What an honor it is to walk this journey towards Home with you, beautiful friend.
The feeling is so very mutual! Have a blessed day Crystal!
CINDY! I just love you! Such a great post and story and I love your writing style! Home is Jesus. Wow I just love that!
Me too Shannon. Sometimes I think growing older and “wiser” is technically a regression. I think I understood this principle much better when I was little. It’s taken me so long to come back to that child-like faith. Thank God (literally) Moses didn’t get warmed up until his eighties. There’s hope! Love you girl!
Oh, Cindy, Cindy, Cindy. Oh how I love your heart. And the idea of “coming home” is beautiful. And true. I will never forget that day, my friend. xo
What a privilege it was to “come home” with you! I’ll never forget it either!
“An arrival….to be what And where I’m meant to be…” This IS my desire! So why do I fight it tooth and nail? I cling tightly to safe and comfortable even when I know I’m missing out on what God has for me. Thank you for your beautiful message. It sounds like you ladies shared a sacred time together! Cindy
You have approached the topic of discipleship from a unique perspective and left me with some wonderful ideas and thoughts to contemplate. (I loved watching the video!) Thank you for sharing and Suzie for writing the book!
Love the reminder about coming home, Cindy! Thank you for sharing your story.
Love this Cindy. When He calls I want to be available. He calls to me all the time when I spend time in His Word and memorize scripture. I love how He has called me to be a Nana, how He called me to substitute teach when I was afraid to, but I did, He called me to work with special needs children and again I was so scared, and then to volunteer as a leader at P31 and oh my scared again, and more recently He is calling me to lose weight and to start a coffee at my home for unchurched neighbors.